I am no stranger to Imposter Syndrome.

Most of my adult life to be honest I have been plagued with it. Feelings of and not limited to: I shouldn’t be here, I’m not experienced enough for this opportunity, I have no business doing this work, why would someone ask me to do this out of other better candidates, I don’t have the body to wear this, I don’t have the brain to participate in this, and probably the one that haunts me the most:

What if the Imposter Syndrome proves true?

These thoughts have permeated into most areas of my adulthood, most prominent in my work, my study, my mothering and my hobbies. Even my hobbies! Case in point – writing this blog I had thoughts of ‘someone else has written about this so much more eloquently and more clearly than me, I should just provide links!’

Imposter Syndrome is gross, pervasive, and a thousand percent the work of devil forces. It’s designed to belittle, to shrink your own capabilities and whittle you to back away from anything that may be exciting, impactful, momentous or showing your own individualism and unique giftings and offerings. It’s sneaky and sometimes very much a snarled undercurrent; a whisper of doubt, or a sneer of condescension that you, of all people, would absolutely not be fit for this amazingly good thing that has been put in your path to explore.

It’s clever – I’ll give it that. If you aren’t a naturally confident person, the voice can be very loud in your head. If you do have confidence and experience with it, you can shove it in a box and only hear the dull cackles, but it is still there. Imposter Syndrome shuts down your inner child, your inner creativity and your inner capabilities if you give in to it.

There are 3 huge flaws its system thought, and once I cottoned onto these flaws I started to figure out how weakly it was engineered. Here’s how I now know Imposter Syndrome is fake:

Flaw #1 – rarely is it task/area confined.

I can only speak for myself here, but for me, Imposter Syndrome pops up in so many areas of life. I was painting something once recently, literally just for fun, and I heard the voice tell me what I was creating was awful. Firstly, rude. But then I critically thought for a moment. I hear that voice when I mother, when I teach, when I write essays, when I write blogs, when I choose a lipstick colour, and I could go on. So then I interrogated the thought some more. Surely, I can’t be that terrible at all of those things (including choosing lipstick colours – um hello?) to the point that I just shouldn’t bother doing any of it? Because what would I do then? If I’m going to listen to the Imposter Syndrome tell me I shouldn’t do any of the things I find joy in just because I’m not perfect at it, then what a waste of life that would be?

If I could give a note to devilish scheme I would suggest that to be more innovative, it should just zoom in on one area of someone’s life to really screw with them. But it just seems invalid and kind of lazy on the devil’s part to be convinced that we are just blanket rubbish at it all. That just doesn’t seem accurate and is far too much of a reach out of reasonability for me to buy it as truth. I will accept of that I am average at many things, but I’m not going to accept that I am terrible at everything because that just doesn’t check out. The math ain’t mathing there because no one is terrible at everything.

Flaw #2 – I understand that perfectionism and humanism are mutually exclusive.

I think a big tactic of Imposter Syndrome is to talk you out of doing things if the outcome isn’t guaranteed to be perfect. If everyone doesn’t laugh at the joke, you failed. If you get 80% positive feedback and 20% constructive feedback, you’ve failed. You yell at your kid so now the guilt has teamed up with Imposter Syndrome to convince you that you are not fit to be a parent. It is literally impossible to never make a mistake or fail. If we didn’t fail, we wouldn’t craft new ways forward. If we didn’t make mistakes, our civilization would be thousands of years behind where it is today, because people just wouldn’t have grown in their thinking, intellect or strengths.

Making mistakes and failing doesn’t mean that we aren’t worthy of new beginnings, new opportunities or exciting experiences. Contrarily, I think it’s actually because we are human that newness always follows. Imposter Syndrome can squash your hopes and dreams for growth if you allow it but its only argument is grounded in perfectionism, which we as humans can’t reach anyway, so again, invalid and irrelevant.

Flaw #3 – Imposter Syndrome works through strangers, not often those who genuinely love you.

I was questioned once, ‘how did you get that job?’, when I began working at the university teaching teachers. I didn’t really know how to respond. The comment felt almost accusatory and definitely felt like the person quizzing me was in disbelief that I would be fit for such a role. The person didn’t know me very well. They didn’t know that I worked extremely hard whilst I studied my own undergrad degree. They didn’t know I had mentor lecturers who helped and invested in me to plan for my future career. They didn’t know I had dreams bigger than a primary classroom. They didn’t know that the unit I was asked to teach on was one that I had received a High Distinction for when I was in the student seat. They didn’t know that before I was asked, I gave two guest lectures to university students to verify my suitability to the role. All they saw was a young woman who wasn’t a greying professor, who had a nine-month old baby on her hip and a laptop on the other, most likely wearing red lipstick and listening to RnB. I didn’t fit the stereotype, so how dare I step foot into a job that they couldn’t visualize me in.

Imposter Syndrome highlights other people’s ignorance to your life and your giftings to help its cause in convincing you that you are not worthy of this opportunity or task. Sometimes it’s not only in your head. It travels to you through others who aren’t close to you to make you second guess. But that’s the flaw! I didn’t know this person very well, and they didn’t know me. When I told my nearest and dearest about this job opportunity, I was met with a bunch of cheerleaders who were convinced I’d smash it imperfectly. If Imposter Syndrome wants a punchier and more convincing impact, it really should prey on your closest and most genuine people around you, not randoms. Does it really think I’m going to absorb insight from someone who doesn’t get me? Absolutely not.

I’m not saying blocking out Imposter’s voice is easy. Some days in can be loud, and some days it can come through to you from the most socially inept person who just doesn’t understand social decorum or etiquette – but that’s the tactic and weaponry that we should expect when facing it. My advice for you is quite simple:

Remember who you are.

Remember where you have been.

Remember where you are going.

Remember what you love.

You don’t have to be perfect to take part.

You don’t have to be the expert to make an impact.

You don’t have to show up in perfect ways to qualify.

Intuition and Imposter are poles apart.

Constructive feedback does not mean you are terrible, it’s means that someone trusted sees amazing things in you, and they are in your corner to help you teach your goals and dreams.

Imposter Syndrome isn’t real life nor other’s perceptions of you.

I also implore you to say these things aloud to yourself:

I am capable.

I am deserving of good things.

I have gifts, talents and desires that lead me to opportunities that I should grasp.

I am not afraid of other’s thoughts and opinions on things relating to me and only me.

And always be:

You.

More you.

The most bold, underlined and italic version you, because you only get one go at this world. Don’t let an uneducated, evil voice in your head decide the parameters of how you live it.